America For Sale!
Public Services Under the Hammer!
Pete's Priority Privatizations
Medicaid – Healthcare Gold Mine
($32B/year, why help people when you can profit from them?)
View Listing
USPS – Rural Post Office Closures!
(Mail delivery: just another luxury rural America can't afford!)
View Listing
National Forests – Timber Profits!
(Trees are just vertical logs waiting to be harvested!)
View Listing
Border Economy – Tariff Opportunity!
(25% Canada Tariffs - Who needs neighbors or allies?)
View Listing
Social Security – Retirement Profits!
(Seniors worked hard for decades... now you cash in!)
View ListingPrivatization Categories
Browse by category to find the perfect public good to transform into private profit!
Limited Time Fire Sales!
- FLASH DEAL: Rural Post Offices! Close them all and save big on delivery costs!
- GOING FAST: National Forests - Become a Logging Tycoon Overnight!
- HOT ITEM: Social Security - Wall Street's Next Big Score!
- NEW LISTING: Presidential Pardons - Justice Just Got Profitable!
- LAST CHANCE: Lake Superior Watershed - Russian Oligarch Approved!
Satisfied Donors & Lobbyists
"I funded Pete's campaign for just $50,000 and got a $5 million mining permit in return! Best ROI ever!"
"Stauber promised to let us drill in protected wilderness areas. Forget future generations, there's money to be made NOW!"
"We're excited about the healthcare privatization opportunities. Sure, millions will lose coverage, but think of the shareholders!"
Don't worry about the citizens of Minnesota! They're just collateral damage in our profit-making strategy!
Don't Wait, Public Assets Are Going Fast!
Join Congressman Pete Stauber in his mission to sell off America piece by piece to the highest bidder!
(Disclaimer: Congress already sold - all sales final, no refunds)